NEW DAY; NEW DIET

These holiday weeks get me all confuddled.  I’ve alternately thought it was Monday and Thursday today.  It’s not.  It’s only Wednesday.  But then it feels like Tuesday because I had Monday off. 

Whatever.

 Where I work they give us Good Friday and Easter Monday off.  They do not pay us for these days, but we don’t get to come to work either.  Now that I make a fairly decent wage, I don’t mind so much.  But I’m not trying to feed a family of six on my salary alone, either.

Friday was fun.  I spent a good chunck of the day with BF and her daughter.  We sandwiched lunch between shopping excursions and I popped my sushi cherry at Sushi Zen.  It’s a wonderful little place that I can’t wait to get back to.  I really surprised myself by how much I loved the sushi.  (Did you know that you don’t have to eat raw fish to have sushi?  I didn’t either, for a long time.)  Aside from the pickled ginger, which tasted a lot like furniture polish and is still repeating on me when I least expect it, I enjoyed everything I sampled in my little Bento Box.  We polished off the meal with Ginger, Red Bean, and Green Tea ice cream scoops.  I was partial to the Red Bean and liked the Green Tea, also.  Alas, I’m not sure I’ll ever feel the same about Ginger.

The rest of the weekend failed in comparison to Friday’s fun.  With the possible exception of Easter Dinner with the SIL, that is.  Any time spent in the presence of my grand-niece is appreciated.  And my Mom came along this year as she would be otherwise orphaned.  She seemed to enjoy herself.

The rest of the time I have spent doing crossword puzzles.  I had picked up a book from Grandma’s things and when I finished that one, I bought two more.  As with all new projects, I became completely obsessed.  I even brought them to work to keep me busy during the down time.   They aren’t the difficult New York Times- type puzzles, but they’re fun.  I like the way the pen feels on the paper and enjoy the tiny bit of vocabulary building they bring.  (Last night I rocked the catagory on Jeopardy that consisted of 3-letter answers.)  Mostly, they are a mind-numbing time-suck that made me feel more productive than the PC game that I usually use for that purpose.

What I would truely like is a vacation from myself and the day-to-day of my life right now.  This has been a sucky year so far and with the endless details involved in the death of a near-and-dear, it doesn’t look like it’s going to be picking up soon.  My mother is at loose ends, understandably, and her previously needy behavior has turned to clingy and completely dependent.  (And even when she isn’t, I worry about her and seek reasurrance that she is okay.)

Last weekend we borrowed a friend’s truck to move the remaining furnishings from Grandma’s apartment to various places about town.  Even though Mom insisted that this would be the last time I’d have to deal with the apartment duties, I could tell from the git that wasn’t going to be the case.  While she had moved things around here and there, in the two weeks since my last visit to the apartment, it didn’t look like anything had been removed.  All of the bags for charity were still there.  All of the things we were going to throw away.  Some of her coworkers had come by to get a few odds and ends (matress and dishes), but the things she was supposed to take care of herself were, in fact, not.  Even the furniture we were taking that day had to have the clutter removed from the top before we could lug it out the door.

I do not want to blame her.  She feels the same way I do.  She doesn’t want to it.  I don’t want to do it.  What she does want to do, however, is keep going back to the apartment.  There she is stopped in the hallways numberous times by the white-haired communers to ask if she is “okay” and to tell her how sweet and cheerful my grandmother was.  I, on the other hand, want to never set foot into the place again.  It makes me sad to go there and see it empty, to not see her brighten when she recognizes me at the end of the hall.  I feel like I am trespassing, whereas my mother feels like she’s come home.

 I will be glad when this part of it is over.  I guess, I will.  Until the next part, at least.